The Emotional Side of Things

So far I have only talked about the physical grievances that I have gone through recently. I have not mentioned the emotional trauma, besides my uncle’s death, I have been through as well. Living with pain is something everybody does, the only difference is how severe it is. One pain is not worse than the other, except the grief of losing a loved one. Losing someone you love is the worst kind of pain. Physical pain can be cured and treated, but there is no medicine for emotional pain. Sophomore year is when my pain started.
The summer before that school year, my aunt suddenly died at the age of 39. I had never lost anyone close to me until then. I had no idea that I would end up losing another loved one within six months. In a previous entry, I mentioned my uncle’s death from cancer. My aunt died July 26, 2012 and my uncle died December 13, 2012. It was common belief that the world was going to end in 2012. Well, for my family, the world did end. My mom is now an only child, and both my aunt’s and uncle’s sons are left with only one parent. 
I don’t know why God decided that my uncle and aunt could die. But I don’t think that he chose to kill them. I was angry with God for taking them from us. In a similar way, I was angry at God for giving me migraines. But lately I have realized that everything good in the world comes from God, and everything bad comes from satan. God sees the future and makes a plan for our lives, but leaves the execution of the plan to us, which is otherwise known as free will. God saw that my uncle and aunt would die and he brought each of them a son into this world. Every time I see those boys I see the beauty of God’s grace. Both my uncle and aunt had been trying and failing to have kids for a long time, so it was truly a blessing for those boys to be born. 
My advice for others who are angry at God is to first, get your anger out. Yell, scream, cry, or just sit in silence. Feelings are meant to be expressed. The feelings that get pent up inside for too long will eventually explode. Once you have the weight of the anger off your chest, look for the small beautiful things God gives after satan takes. Look for the miracle children, the newfound strength, and most of all, forgive. Since God can forgive us for all of our sins, He deserves our forgiveness. 
“You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl our iniquities into the depths of the sea.” Micah 7:18-19
Love always,
Sierra